What's with that killer hour?

April 9th, 2010 - 127 days until Wedding

I know there are many of you out there who are just like me. You may try to hide this embarrassing problem but I am about to expose it to the world. You know that time span during the day, that one where you are on the edge of your seat and your self control feels like it is about to just go out the window? That hour or two where that toxic friend, for simplicity we will call "Snacking", rolls on in an threatens to ruin everything you have worked so hard for all day long. You never hear him or her coming, but she manages to show up everyday when you have those few precious hours by yourself.

A whisper of "Just grab something to eat, it wont hurt you. Just one little cookie wont damage the day." You know the voice I'm talking about. The one we give in to ever so often. It's strange the power this tiny voice has over our mind, it can convince us that anything is good. Once that seed is planted in your brain it becomes an obsession. It's like something has taken over your body, you act without thinking and even though your will power is trying ever so hard to drown out this devilish friend, your body moves as if on auto pilot. It's almost as if you are having an out of body experience. You can see your hand reach out for that box of Girl Guide cookies, and that inner voice is screaming "STOP" yet the hand manages to ignore the shrieking and then...... it's over. You taste that sweet vanilla cookie melting in your mouth and every problem from that day seems to melt away with the icing. When you finally snap back into reality you realize that the unthinkable is staring you right back in the face! The two sides of the cookie box are now uneven! Oh know the world is now off balance. It's like a crisis has come upon humanity and you are the only one who can fix it. "Must equal out cookies", you've become a zombie slave to the cookie box and when you finally wake up all progress from the day has gone down the drain. You are left feeling guilty with an empty cookie box laying next to you on the floor and crumbs scattered around you.

Once you stop feeling sorry for yourself, you suddenly realize that you must now hide the evidence of your undoing. If your significant other or roommate find out what you have done the shame will be unbearable. How could they ever find out that you are such a savage animal during a few select hours of the day. You are now scrambling to destroy the evidence and to continue on with your day as if nothing happened.

For me, this time of day is from the time I get home from school until the time I leave for gymnastics. that dreaded 4:00pm - 5:30pm hour. I need to overcome this or I will never be successful at becoming the woman that I would like to be. Now that the weather has become nicer my plan is to head out for a short walk during this time, just some quiet time outside in the sun where I can reflect on how well I have done throughout the day. Celebrate my tiny accomplishments without fearing the friend I like to call "Snacking"

XOXO